For months, my 6 year old son struggled with math. He started hating it so bad because he did not understand the lesson and he was left clueless whenever they’d have a task to do.
He hated it and told me he wished math didn’t exist. He was exaggerating of course, but the effect was getting worse every day; he didn’t like math, he didn’t want to attend the class for fear that he wouldn’t be able to answer anything. He did not want to hear the word math and he would cry during and after class because he hated math.
Those who have hatred needs guidance
I had to assist him for a week. I told him it’s okay if he doesn’t understand it yet. I couldn’t teach him because his mind was closed that he hated math so it would be useless to teach him about their lesson. I would simply be there for him and guide him by asking him what to do in each step. Questions would always look like these: “Is this greater than ___?” “What do we do if the first number is lesser?” “What is 8-3?-if he initially says he doesn’t know, I’d say “Can you open your fingers for me and give me 8? Remove 3 from your fingers… and so on. You get it. It was as if I was teaching a beginner the basics of math again.
Along the way, by the third day, he suddenly said “I think I’m starting to get it.” He then would affirm statements “so, the reason why I borrow is…” “Oh, so I have to start here all the time” the realization and understanding came eventually because someone was there to be with him when he couldn’t understand. Someone assisted him when he didn’t know what to do.
Night came and when he was about to pray before sleeping, he started giggling and he would cover his eyes saying “I can’t belive I’m about to say this!!! I think I love math already!”
Those who have hatred needs understanding
What a switch, what a transformation. From hate to love, just because he now understands things a lot better now.
This got me thinking about why many people hate what they hate. Sometimes, the real problem is that they just couldn’t understand things yet. Whether it is for work, relationships, knowing God, or learning, people will always hate something they don’t fully understand.
The solution is to be open to understanding why you hate what you hate, I hope that makes sense. This is not hatred towards evil things. No that is different. Maybe you hate your work, your boss, your God, your husband or wife, your rebellious kid, your relatives, your neighbor, your lesson perhaps? Whatever it is that you hate, take time to seek God and ask for understanding. Maybe like this child who hated math before, you’ll learn to love those people you hate once you’ve understood where the hate is coming from.
Dear Reader,
If you have found yourself full of hate,
I am telling you right now that it is time to let go.
Your hate does not make the other person or the thing you hate become less, but it brings damage to you more than you can imagine.
It makes your heart more vulnerable to offense,
It makes your heart callous and you reject the love of the people around you.
It is unfair to those who are close to you to direct your anger and hate towards them.
When someone hurts you, it doesn’t mean you have to hurt others too.
Today, may you encounter God’s loving embrace.
Be reminded of this:
“For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him;
as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.
As a father shows compassion to his children, so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him. – Psalm 103:11-13
He has shown compassion to you
Believe it or not, he has shown compassion towards those who have hurt you, and he is still hopeful that one day, both of you will turn from your hurtful and hateful ways and be reconciled through God’s love.
He loves you and what others meant for evil, don’t forget that God can always turn it for your good and benefit.
Yours,
Gilian